Post-Op Day 1

Feeling pretty good considering I just had surgery yesterday. I also got a dozen roses from Jay today!

Wednesday was our 3rd anniversary. And we didn't get to celebrate b/c we were in Memphis, preparing for my surgery. So we're planning on celebrating this weekend. The flowers were a sweet surprise.

So far I am doing wonderfully from the surgery (other than being very irritable). I don't think I've ever been so irritable. I'm blaming it on the pain medicine they gave me after surgery. But I'm not totally sure. I know it's getting better, though. Thank goodness! I know that Jay's happy about that too! :) Hopefully I'll be back to my old self tomorrow.

So I could actually see the septum on the pics my doctor gave me. It was very neat to actually SEE the problem and know that he fixed it. The septum tissue was white, and when he cut into it there was no bleeding. Once he'd cut through the septum to good tissue, then it began to bleed. That's how the doctor knew when to stop cutting. When he saw blood, he knew that he was into the good vascular uterine tissue.

My uterine cavity is now 25-30% bigger than it was before. It's normal!! Woohoo!

We are now on a 2 month break from trying to conceive. I really don't mind the wait. I need a break. I want some time to relax, refresh and enjoy life before delving back in to pregnancy tests, ovulation tests and thought of pregnancy and miscarriage.

My doctor also said that he estimates our chance of having a baby at 75%. I'm not sure exactly how he arrived at that number. I was still asleep as he was explaining everything to my family. But that's something I'll ask him more about at our follow-up appointment.

But I won't put too much stock in the numbers because I know that the Lord can do anything. However, I do think 75% is a great chance. And I'm thankful for that good report.

I'm SO relieved to have this surgery behind me!

I'm also waiting to hear the results from the long list of labs he did prior to surgery to further investigate the possible clotting disorder.

And then.... This is IT. All tests have been done. This is what it's come down to. The septum (which is now gone!!!) and a possible clotting disorder.

Tonight I'm very thankful that God has brought me this far. He's been very faithful to me, and I'm eternally grateful! I'm taking one step at a time with Him! :)

God Bless You all!

xoxo,

Birdie

creekjc @ nctc . com

That Septum is Outta Here!!!

I'm already home from my surgery. It was a long couple of days. We spend the night in Memphis last night and got up early this morning to go to the surgery center.

The surgery was a success!!!!! THANK YOU, LORD!!!!!!

The septum is gone. Now I'll be healing for at least the next 2 months before trying to conceive again.

I'm SO thankful that I came through this surgery safely and that all went well.

God Bless you all. Thank you for your prayers. It means so much.

I would write more, but I'm still so tired from the anesthesia and the whole experience in general. So good night for now.

Thanking Jesus,

Birdie

Results

THANK YOU, LORD!!! This morning I got the wonderful news that my mammogram was NORMAL!!!! I also got the news yesterday evening that the ultrasound was normal!!!! I am SO utterly relieved! I am so very grateful! This is one more thing that I can add to my list of answered prayers. Not only were the tests normal, but the Lord answered my prayers by being with me and giving me comfort and peace.

Yet, I know that somewhere in the world today a young woman was told that she does have breast cancer. I know that God loves that woman (or women) dearly. And I pray for them, that they would know God & feel His peace & presence surrounding them on all sides.

Now, I'm preparing for surgery tomorrow. I'm ready to get that septum out and move forward! Thank you for your prayers.

I hope you all have a wonderful day!

God Bless You

Awaiting Results

I really hate waiting for results!

This afternoon I went to the clinic and had my mammogram and ultrasound. The mammogram really wasn't bad. I had some fear that it would hurt, but there was really nothing to it.

**ALERT!! I JUST GOT A CALL FROM MY DR'S OFFICE**

Okay, I just learned that my breast ultrasound was NEGATIVE!!!!!!!! She said that means that it was normal, no masses, no abnormalities!!!

BUT they still do not have the mammogram results yet. She will call me as soon as they get them tomorrow.

Any words of wisdom? Your own experience? From what I've read, ultrasound is actually more reliable in young women anyway. So I think this is a GREAT sign!!!!! Although, I will feel more relieved once I hear that the mammogram is normal too!

THANK YOU, LORD!!!!!!!! I am almost ready to dance & shout!!! :)

Please keep praying for continued good results.

I thank the Lord for this answered prayer!

Tomorrow's Mammogram & Ultrasound

I am so thankful for strength from God. Having a mammogram & ultrasound on Tuesday to make sure I don't have breast cancer and then surgery on Thursday (and in a city four hours away) is a lot to go through.

YET...

I know that He sustains me. I keep praying and leaning on Him. I couldn't make it without the Lord!

Please do keep me in your prayers. I'm hoping that by this time next week:

1) I will know that the breast lumps were merely cysts and nothing to worry about and

2) that the surgery was a huge success!

I also want to share that Jay & I hosted a prayer meeting at our house Friday night. We had around 16 people come, and I baked and made snacks all day long. It was a HIT! Everybody loved the food, and I felt such a sense of accomplishment. I love hosting & baking. What fun!! And we also had a wonderful time of prayer and a very encouraging message. It was just what I needed.

xoxo

Have a great day!

I will remember the deeds of the LORD; yes, I will remember your miracles of long ago. I will meditate on all your works and consider all your mighty deeds. Psalms 77:11-12

Home Visit #1

This morning we had our first home visit with our social worker. We are on our way to becoming foster/adoptive parents. We are taking this slowly and one day at a time. Still, I am excited to see what's to come!

In other news, I'm still scheduled for the mammogram & ultrasound next week. Then on Thursday is my surgery to remove the uterine septum.

Please do keep me in your prayers. I appreciate it so much.

I have a lot of anxiety about the mammogram & ultrasound results and also the surgery. But I keep trusting the Lord, and I know He's with me!

I hope you all have a wonderful day!!!

Foster/Adoptive Mom

Well, so much has been going on lately that I've neglected to share some important information!!!

Tomorrow morning Jay & I will have our first home study to become foster/adoptive parents!!

This is the first big step (after taking the classes & turning in the paperwork) to move towards approval.

As I've mentioned before, 2 of my darling nieces were adopted through foster care. Jay & I love them so much, and we are huge fans of adoption!

The social worker is coming bright & early in the morning. I'll let you know how it goes!!

God Bless You All! Thank you so much for reading my blog! :)

Fibrocystic Breasts

Have any of you ever found a lump in your breast? Multiple lumps?

Well, I recently did. I did a breast exam, on a whim, after my last miscarriage. It was the first one I had done in years. To my horror, I discovered multiple lumps. I daily fought against fear, wondering if I could possibly have breast cancer.

I am only 30 (almost 31). I did lots of research, and my lumps appear to be cysts. They are mostly mobile and rounded. And breast cancer does not run in my family.

Still, I went to my ob/gyn. He felt them and said that I have fibrocystic breast changes and that he felt nothing worrisome. That was last month.

I was relieved for a few days.

Then I began to think crazy thoughts again. What if my doctor is wrong? What if I have something terribly wrong? I know the chances are slim. But I mean, I've already had 4 miscarriages. What were the chances of that happening?

Fear began to take hold. I was daily battling these thoughts and fears, praying & asking God to help me and set me free from fear. I have obsessively done breast exams almost daily & sometimes multiple times a day. I have battled against anxiety, struggling to catch my breath at times, on the verge of a panic attack.

So my husband insisted that I go back to the doctor for more answers.

That's what I did today.

I went back to my ob/gyn and explained to him that I've been very fearful. I asked him to examine me again & explain WHY he doesn't think these lumps are worrisome and WHY he believes they are cysts.

So he examined me again, noted several lumps in both breasts (particularly the left), listened to my symptoms and (this is the part I'm very unhappy about...)

ordered a mammogram and ultrasound.

I DO NOT WANT MORE TESTING DONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Everything within me is SO over the tests and the doctor visits and the waiting and the upset stomach from being so nervous.

But I prayed before I went that God would lead my doctor and that the right thing would be done and that I would trust whatever he said and be at peace about it.

My doctor doesn't think I have breast cancer. But he said that I should get the testing done just to be sure. If I don't, then he and I will both have a nagging feeling of worry. He said that once I get the tests done, then I will feel relieved.

I know that's true.

But he also said something else that was terrible to hear:

"If you do get these tests done and they show something, then I will refer you to a surgeon."

WHAT?!!!! A SURGEON????????????!

I am already having surgery next week to remove the septum. This will be my 3rd surgery in less than a year. I just had my 4th miscarriage. And now THIS??

These are some of the thoughts that I have had this evening. My stomach has also felt very upset and burning (like on the first day of school or before you have to speak in front of a large crowd).

YET, I'm SO thankful for that sweet peace that passes understanding that comes from the Lord.

The Lord has given me a peace and calm this evening that took away my fears. I know that I will go through nothing without Him. He will never leave me or forsake me. And compared to what some are going through right now, this is such a small trial. And besides that, God reminded me that He knows when I will die. He knows His plans for me. He is surprised by nothing. And even if someone is the healthiest person in the world, they can die suddenly in an accident or by some other means. So my hope is not in my health. My hope is in the Lord. And no matter what happens, whether I die tomorrow or whether I die when I am 100 years old, what really matters is that I will spend ETERNITY with Jesus. This life is but a little while. Eternity is forever and ever and ever. I'm so thankful that I have salvation and that I know I will be with Jesus forever. How sweet it is!!!

Please do still pray for me. I often pray for you, my blog friends as well.

As always, feel free to email me as well: creekjc @ nctc . com

Blessings to You!

Septum

Well, as far as septums go, some are tall & skinny and some are short and fat - just like people. That's what my new RE who specializes in RPL said to me when he called on Saturday morning. "And yours is short & fat," he went on to say.

So that's why it has been misdiagnosed. It basically extends all the way across the top of my uterus. (For those of you unfamiliar with

septums, a septum is basically extra tissue in your uterus that does not have good blood supply. So if the baby implants there, it cannot develop properly.) Several doctors have seen this and said things like, "It looks septum-like, but I see no evidence of a septum." I've also been told that I have an arcuate shaped uterus. And with my last pregnancy (and subsequent miscarriage), there was some debate over whether I had a cornual ectopic or whether it just looked that way b/c of the shape of my uterus.

All of these comments and debate sent warning bells off for my new RE. And upon further investigation (doing a 3-D ultrasound of my uterus & reviewing my HSG films) he believes that I do indeed have a septum. And he wants to get it out of there!!!

There was also a lab value that was a little abnormal. It was the lupus anticoagulant. So he's going to do a slew of other labs when I come down to Memphis for my surgery to further investigate that abnormal lab.

He said that this is IT! This is what we've narrowed it down to - the septum and the possible clotting factor. Beyond this, I don't think there's anything more to be tested for. Everything else has come back normal.

So how do I feel about all this???

Well, if I could have the surgery done tomorrow, I would. I am SO ready to have this over and done with.

Am I excited??

I'll admit that I'm a little excited. I do have some hope. But I'm not going to get all excited and think that the mysteries of my RPL are solves and done with. I'm hoping & praying that's the case. But I will not allow myself to get too excited, only to be disappointed and devastated. So I'm taking this one step at a time.

Surgery is in less than 3 weeks!

In the meantime, here's what I've been doing lately:

I've been working in the hot KY humidity, weeding my flowers. The weeds had just about taken over, but this week I got them all cleaned up! And surprise! I loved it when I went out one day and there was a beautiful RESURRECTION lily. It made my day and reminded me of the power of Jesus and how he can bring life & hope where there seems to be none.

Jay & I visited a local orchard. I LOVE going there! I got a 1/2 bushel of yummy, sweet, ripe peaches!

Can you find the sweet little kitty cat hidden amongst all the peaches at the orchard? :)

When I got home I had a lot of peeling to do! But it was worth it!

Look how lovely my canned peaches turned out (with the help of my mom!!). :)

And here are my peach preserves along with some blackberry jam that I made a few weeks ago all by myself!

I want you to leave you with a verse I've been quoting a lot lately: For God has not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. 2 Timothy 1:7

God bless you all!!! And, as always, if you are unable to leave a comment on my blog, feel free to email me at creekjc @ nctc. com

Thinking on Things That are Lovely

The other day Jay & I met at the park for lunch. We have so much fun together. I'm so thankful for him.

Before Jay & Imet I had been single for several years. Every person I liked was never interested in me. In college we had something called Roomie's Night Out.

During Roomie's Night Out, your roommate would ask someone to go out with you. Then everyone would go out together on a huge date night. We would do things like bowling & ice skating. It was even a stretch for them to find someone to go with me! I don't know why I was so hard to find a match for. I mean, I don't think I was that strange or weird! haha It's just that nothing ever worked out. (Which, of course, I'm glad about that now!)

So for several years I stayed single and longed to be married. After college I spent 2 years in Asia. There were days of such immense loneliness over there. I prayed fervently for God to bring "the one" into my life. And I kept trusting Him with all my heart to do it.

Then, when and where I was least expecting it, God ANSWERED and did above and beyond anything I had even asked or dreamed of. I had just finished my first year in Asia and was home for a short summer break before going back for my second year. I never dreamed in a million years that I would meet someone from my HOMETOWN that very summer!!! I mean, I'm from a small town in southern Kentucky. I didn't think anyone here would share my interests and my dreams. Boy, did God prove me wrong!!

So while I was home that summer, my mom came in one night from church with a name written on a little piece of paper. She handed it to me and said, "Do you know him?" It was Jay's name. I remembered him from high school but only vaguely, and we'd never met. I was immediately uninterested. I told my mom that he probably wouldn't be my type. (I had in my mind that my husband would be from somewhere OTHER than my little hometown.) But my mom wouldn't give in. "Just give him a chance!" I finally gave in and said, "I'll go out with him once. But if I don't like him, that's it!!" haha God must have been smiling because I had no idea that I was about to meet my husband.

So a lady at church had told my mom about Jay. This lady was friends with my mom and also friends with Jay's mom. So the three ladies worked it all out, getting Jay's name to me, getting my phone number to Jay and encouraging him to call me.

A couple days later the phone rang. It was Jay!!! He had gotten up the nerve to call me! He sweetly and quickly asked me if I would like to go out to eat with him. We were on the phone about a whole 2 minutes!! :)

So we went and had a wonderful time. We talked the whole time even though we're usually both pretty shy. When I got home that night I still wasn't totally 100% convinced, but by our second date, I knew that this was THE ONE. Everything clicked and sparked, and we just KNEW! All those years of prayers by Jay & me and our moms and families and friends were being answered right before our very eyes!!

This picture was taken on one of our first dates together that summer.

We went to the KY State Fair in Louisville with my sister & her family. We had only been out a few times, and we were falling fast! :) Jay was the ultimate gentleman. He treated me like a princess and was so very respectful and sweet. Not only that, but I discovered his love for art and his talent for painting, drawing, singing & playing piano. And to top it all off, he's a good horse rider, roper & trainer. And most importantly, the loves the Lord!

We only got to be together for 5 weeks before I had to return to Asia for a year.

Here we are at the Nashville Airport. I felt like my heart

was breaking in two!!

While I was gone we wrote emails and letters and talked on skype every day. Here's Jay writing me an email. We missed each other SO much!!

The city I lived in in Asia was very polluted, so I often couldn't see the sky. So Jay would take pictures of the beautiful KY sky and send to me. It helped me get through a lot of homesickness.

During that year that I was in Asia, he and my mom came to visit me in China. It was Jay's first ever plane ride!! They stayed for 9 days. Then I came home for 3 weeks during our winter break. We got engaged while I was home, after knowing one another for 6 months. Then it was back to Asia again for the spring semester. The days ticked by so slowly.

When I finally was home to stay, we got married 6 weeks later!! It was one of the happiest, most magical days of my life!

We honeymooned in Virginia & had a wonderful time.

Now we've been married almost 3 years, and I love him even more than I did on our wedding day. I still often think of the miracle that God did when He brought us together. I'm so grateful. I'm so very blessed.

It was so fun reminiscing today! I hope that y'all all have a wonderful day today & think on some lovely things today that give you joy.

Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Phil. 4:8